One Stroke at a Time

Casey Shanley Kegelman ’05 returned to Suffield on September 28 to share her story of adversity, resilience, and gratitude. Throughout her chapel talk, Casey reflected on how her experience as a Suffield Academy student helped prepare her to face profound challenges later in life.

Casey described her four years at Suffield as a formative experience shaped by inspiring teachers, meaningful friendships, and a strong sense of belonging. After graduating from Wheaton College where she continued her swimming career, her love of Suffield brought her back to work in the admissions office. The school remained an important part of her life and her husband Harry proposed to her on the Tremaine Art Terrace.

Some of her most influential lessons at Suffield came through swimming. Under coaches Greg Lynch and the legendary Andy Lowe she discovered the joy of competing for a team and developed the discipline, perseverance, and consistency that later became essential in her life. “We were Tigers. Everything was orange and black. The cheers, the team gear, and the spirit around campus. We trained together, competed together, celebrated each other, and pushed each other. When I was standing behind the blocks about to swim my own race, I knew I wasn’t swimming alone. There was a team behind me. And that became an incredibly important lesson in my life.” As a distance swimmer, she learned to find her rhythm and focus on one stroke, one breath, and one lap at a time.

In August 2020, Casey was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 33. She completed treatment the following May. As she and Harry were preparing to welcome a daughter, Harry passed away unexpectedly in January 2023. Their son, Hank, was four. Their daughter, Frankie, was born a few months later.

Casey spoke candidly about learning to carry grief after Harry’s tragic passing while making room for joy. The lessons of distance swimming helped her focus on the day ahead and take life one step at a time. Reflecting on what she has learned about resilience she shared, “Resilience isn’t about pushing yourself as hard as you possibly can. Sometimes resilience is knowing how to conserve your energy, breathe, find your rhythm, and keep going—and knowing when to let someone help you.”

Casey shared with the Suffield community the same message she hopes her children will carry with them: beautiful things can still happen after heartbreaking ones, joy and sorrow can exist side by side, and hope is something we can choose. She brings that message into her everyday life through a simple phrase: PVO—Positive Vibes Only. “It means paying attention to what makes life feel a little lighter. It’s finding people who understand you, support you, make you laugh, and remind you of who you are. It’s acknowledging the hard, but also looking around and recognizing all that you do have. And being grateful.”

Casey will carry that PVO mindset with her as she runs the New York City Marathon this November in honor of Harry and for Fred’s Team at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center. “I’m running because, in a lot of ways, this marathon represents the same lesson swimming taught me years ago. I can’t think about mile 26 when I’m at mile 2. I have to focus on the mile I’m in…the next step…the next breath…the next mile. And that’s really how I’ve learned to move through life. Just trusting that if I keep putting one foot in front of the other, I’ll get there. And maybe that’s what resilience really is. Not knowing what’s around the corner, but continuing to take the next step anyway.”

Casey’s message resonated with the entire Suffield community, encouraging everyone to carry PVO—Positive Vibes Only—into their own lives. “You don’t have to know the whole course. You just have to swim the next stroke. Not pretending to be perfect. Just choosing to notice the light.”

View Casey’s Presentation   Follow PVO on Instagram